I’ve gotten this about 200 times and have ignored it every damned time. But now…

I received a strange request yesterday…

…not strange in the sense of not having seen it before. I’ve now seen this same question maybe 200 times, in the past nine years of this blog. The strange part was where it came from.

In the past – up to about an hour ago, in fact – I’ve said some pretty harsh things about The French. But, for reasons I’ve never understood, my second largest international audience is…France. (UK is #1; #3, stunningly, is HONG KONG?) I love a LOT of things about France; Paris, mostly, but the wines of Alsace and Provence and Champagne and all that lovely cheese. But the French ‘Tude about wine irritates me no end. So, when I got a request for this same thing from a French website, I decided to finally do it – ONCE! One muhfuggen time! – and be done with it.

I didn’t even ask why they wanted it but they told me: they’re asking this of about a dozen beverage writers from all over the planet, so…I’d be a jackass to say no, right?

Here it is, pasted here directly from their email, which was, I suspect, run through Google Translator:  “Could you send to us list of favorite beers, wines and spirits, please? Not which those you enjoy the highest but what you eniolez to drink. Thanks you!”

I replied immediately and told them that the list would probably be a bunch of things the French Average Jean would never see in their lifetime but they said, basically, “We are without caring, you salope Américaine stupide!”

I’ve gotten this about 200 times and have ignored it every damned time. But now, because of some inquiring Surrender Monkeys, here it is, presented without comments, and with the provision that this is the list as it stands TODAY, Cinco de Mayo, 2017, A.D. I chose to limit each category to five…or six…unless it goes to seven…okay, maybe eight. (How’s that for decisive?) Tomorrow, it might be radically different but for this day, this morning, here are the beverages that I choose when I have hot cash in my pocket and am looking for sheer, hedonistic pleasure…God forgive me…

BEERS:

(L to R)

Sound Brewing “Monk’s Indiscretion”       Deschutes “Jubelale”

St. Feullien Brune Reserve       Crux Fermentation Project “Freakcake”

Boulder Brewing “Hazed”      Laurelwood Brewing “Workhorse”

Fort George Brewing “The Optimist”       Reuben’s Brews “Crikey”

Would Probably Be On This List If They Were Sold In Washington:   Three Taverns “A Night In Brussels” Belgian IPA   /    Cigar City “Jai Alai” White Oak IPA    /    Three Floyds “Dark Lord”  and “Zombie Dust”  /   Crooked Stave Brewing anything   /   River North Brewing “Avarice”, “Hoppenberg”, “J. Marie”, and “Nightmare”   /    Societe Brewing “The Butcher” and “The Volcanist”    /   Renegade Brewing “Bedwetter” Barleywine   /    Strange Craft Beer Co.  “Cherry Kriek” and Breakfast IPA   /    Maine Beer Co. “Mo”, “Lunch”, and “Dinner”…and maybe two dozen others.

WINES:

 

(L to R)

Allegrini  “Palazzo della Torre”       Cantine Marisa Cuomo “Fiorduva”

Cellar Tomàs Cusiné “Vilosell”       Sparkman Cellars “The Darkness”

Peter Lehmann Barossa Cabernet       Portalupi Dry Creek Zinfandel

 

 

SPIRITS:

Bruichladdich “The Botanist” Gin       Stein Distillery Rye Vodka

John B. Stetson Kentucky Straight Bourbon Whiskey

George Dickel Superior No. 12 Whiskey

Bowmore Islay 12 Single Malt Scotch Whiskey

The Balvenie “Caribbean Cask” Single Malt Scotch Whiskey

Laphroaig “Lore” Islay Single Malt Scotch Whiskey

That, as the English say, is the lot. Tomorrow…well, who knows?